Ronin of the Spirit

Because reality is beautiful.

Giant Swirling Storm of Death

So, I live on the Gulf Coast.  Right now, a malstrom of destruction named Gustav is pointed straight at the heart of the Gulf Coast.  Straight. At. Me.  Now this is bad for a lot of reasons.

(1.) We are probably going to have to evacuate, which is a pain.

(2.) My sister moved.  Since I can’t list my evac address there, I have to find someone to live with.  The only person available is a very long drive.

(3.) This means the international trip I was going take is probably going to go down the crapper with post Gustav clean up.

(4.) If our international trip is not canceled, we will have at least a week taken out of our too short thirty days to prepare.

Sigh.

But two good things.  One, I am getting a pretty good raise.  Two, even though I admit I am a Deist, I still view the world around me in atheist’s terms.

Why would believing that there is no God involved in this storm make me happy?  Thanks for asking.  Because there is NOTHING I can do about it.

See, before, I would have felt that there was some higher purpose. I would have thought the beautiful morsel of this oversees assignment dangled in front of me and then (probably) yanked away to break my heart on purpose so that God would have a chance to deal with my prideful heart.

Then, I will feel awful for being so selfish.  I mean a hurricane is heading straight for me and I am not even thinking about what this means.  It’s the wrath of God, you know.

I would be desperately praying that the hurricane wouldn’t hit, then praying that I would accept God’s will, and praying that God would forgive me for being so attached to what I wanted, and forgive me for setting my heart so much on this plum assignment I wanted instead of what He wanted.   Guilt.  Frustration. Fear. Self loathing.  Pretty much a whole gamut of negativity.

So, you know what I am doing now?  I am chillin’.  There is a hurricane coming and there’s not a damn thing I can do about it.  I don’t feel any guilt for not somehow relating to this hurricane in a morally correct manner.  I am not responsible for this in any way.  If it hits and destroys my apartment, it’s not my fault.  If it hits and doesn’t destroy my apartment, that’s not my fault either.

Since I don’t trust God to deliver me if I do the right things, there is no way I can “fail” this hurricane.  I have total peace with Gustav.

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August 27, 2008 - Posted by | Religion, Uncategorized | , , , ,

7 Comments »

  1. Oh man! I saw about that on the news. Didn’t know you and your family were in that area, though. Please keep us posted as you’re able.

    I know what you mean about the peace of accepting these kinds of things without the God factor. Another benefit is that we don’t have to feel betrayed by God if things go wrong even after we pray as “properly” as we know how. You know what I mean?

    Anyway, you take care of yourself and your lovely family. I’ll be keeping an eye on the weather reports and checking in here for updates.

    Comment by Lottie | August 28, 2008 | Reply

  2. That peace feeling is God..you just don’t know it yet.

    Comment by Kaitlyn | August 31, 2008 | Reply

  3. I pray that you, and everyone else on the Gulf makes it through this okay.

    Comment by Kaitlyn | August 31, 2008 | Reply

  4. […] purely fictional piece was inspired by Truthwalker, a fellow blogger who evacuated his home yesterday morning to avoid Hurricane […]

    Pingback by Idiosyncratica September Challenge « Rambling On | September 1, 2008 | Reply

  5. my prayers are with all the people in the path of the storm may the good lord bless you all and keep you safe

    Comment by carol norris | September 1, 2008 | Reply

  6. Do yourself a favor and never post again. Living near the ocean will require that you evacuate at some point. If you can not afford to live in a place where you will have to evacuate. Then do not live near the ocean. People tend to just find things to talk about. Read this post for direction. God has been very good to me. He has giving me enough sense to know where I live and what to expect.

    Comment by Sam | September 3, 2008 | Reply

  7. Uh, Sam? What the heck is wrong with you? How is not posting doing myself a favor? Who said I couldn’t afford to evacuate? Read what post for direction? I’m glad that God has been good to you and given you sense, maybe you should ask him for more, because your comment doesn’t make any.

    Comment by truthwalker | September 3, 2008 | Reply


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